Belle Of The Ball

There is no escaping the fact that I’ve been inspired by LGBTQ History Month, so inspired in fact that I’ve written this poem on topic of dancing especially to commerorate the event. I’ve deliberatly written it from the point of view of two mature women one of whom may be a transwoman, becoming romantically involved after meeting at a dancing class. I’ve given it the title Belle Of The Ball I hope you enjoy the read.

Belle Of The Ball

my partner birls me round the floor
I’m feeling apprehensive
she told me relax
as she takes me in hand
and whispers something io
says she knew that I was just the right type
she would teach the steps and the twirls
from that moment on
I gave her my trust
I knew she liked dancing with girls

Of course she’d been married
for most of her life
the respectable types
always are
she knew she liked women
she had since her teens
though she thought it a step too far
as she taught me to waltz
as a women should do
and to tango the
Argentine way
we kissed under stars
and got in to the grove
our desires had come to play

she told me her daughters encouraged her
to take up dancing lessons
the youngest one said she should talk to the priest
and maybe start going to confession
it’s just in case you meet a man
who gets you all excited
or maybe do what Katie did
like kiss a girl and like it.

my dancing partner smiled at the thought
as her youngest daughter blushed
I’ll just see how it goes she said
and enjoy some fun filled lust
her daughters thought that we were friends
until they saw us kiss
in ways that only women know
we shared some midnight bliss

She told them all it’s my time now
it’s time to take a chance
your dad would be so proud of the fact
I taught this girl to dance
he knew I had my tendencies
and the passions I kept at bay
he said that I should dance with girls
if that was nature’s way

As its if he was giving his blessing
she told me as we danced
she’d waited all her life for this
we had to take the chance
a woman knows what a woman knows
and she knew what to say
I felt like the belle of The ball that night
and we danced to the break of the day

© Gayle Smith 2022

Naked Threats

Over the past 18 months or so I’ve become aware of organisation called Refuge who campaign to end domestic violence against women and children. On receiving an email from them on the abuse or threats of abuse targeted at women with regards to use of internet images I decided to write a poem on it in the hope it will raise awareness of this particular kind of cyber crime. I’ve titled it Naked Threats I hope you enjoy what I think will be a thought provoking read

Naked Threats

At first she trusted him
to respect her dignity
protect both her honour
and her right to privacy
keeping those images
they once shared as a couple
in a secret location
where they couldn’t be discovered

now abusing his power
and the trust they once had
a cold hearted monster
he is driving her mad
as he boasts he’ll send pictures
in her black lingerie
that her friends and her family
might not want to see

when she went to the police
to report naked threats
the officer asked her
has he sent any yet
well threatening to do stuff
isn’t really a crime
though we know that’s treading
a very fine line.

disillusioned and dejected
she felt no-one listened
but she didn’t walk the dark road
she made it her mission
to speak for victims
and start a campaign
which will end this abuse
and will make a real change

in this 21st century
as women and girls
we deserve so much better
in this unequal world
yet we still have to fight
to be given respect
as lovers and partners
we’ll take no naked threats

© Gayle Smith 2021

Women Of Wisdom (A Poem For International Women’s Day ).

I wrote this poem on International Women’s Day to celebrate some of the best women I know or have ever known. These women come from all walks of life from family to football, from poetry to politics, but make no mistake they have earned there place in this poem which I have titled Women Of Wisdom and by the end of it I think you’ll know me a lot better than you already do even if you’ve known me for years. I hope you enjoy the read.

Women Of Wisdom (A Poem For International Women’s Day )

My maternal gran
left school at the age of nine
having learned all she was allowed
she was proud to be red Jess
a woman who fought for equality
in the years between the wars
with the banner of justice held high
for the Scotland of MacLean

my paternal gran made enough soup
to feed the close
and brought her children up
in the faith of our fathers and theirs
she taught them the value
of sharing what they had
and being glad for the grounding they received
in doing whatever they could do help others

my auntie Helen was my mum’s older sister
she moved to Manchester during the war
to work in munitions
eventually agoraphobia would keep her prisoner
in the home she seldom left
and hardly ever stopped cleaning

my mother worked in engineering
as an inspector Clouseau had nothing on her
never missing a trick
when it came to keeping me in line
even if it was a struggle to deal
with a bolshie trans daughter
who had very definite opinions on almost everything
and wasn’t afraid to tell you
exactly what they were and why
she held those beliefs

Mrs Dowling was the English teacher
who opened my eyes to the world
as she taught me the meaning of poetry
introducing me to Lochhead and a world beyond Burns
where women’s voices were
not only listened to but respected
for what they had to say and stories only they could ever tell

Margo was my earliest political heroine
a woman of independent mind
her fight for Scotland’s independence
inspired the teenaged me
to campaign for freedom and fairness
as I continue to do to this day
in honour of the legacy that inspired generations
to believe we could do better

Fiona was the artistic director
who helped me to express myself
during workshops in the Gallowgate
then eventually on stage
inducting me in the ways of theatre and especially voice projection
for maximum power and effect

Janette is the flatmate and friend
who knows both my weaknesses and strengths
though sometimes I don’t think
she knows her own
especially her good points
of which she has more than a few
though supporting a team in light blue may not be one of them

Sam would disagree with that last comment
and get away with it
well she plays for that team
I am trying so hard not to mention
creative licence means it’s not always easy to avoid suggesting
who they might be
let’s just say they aren’t Glasgow City or Celtic or even Partick Thistle
and blow the whistle now
before some people see their name
through my carefully constructed disguise

Ailie is always there when required
a friend who encourages me
to aim higher in every possible way
shoot for the stars every day
and accept myself for who I am
embracing my identity without compromise
to please the opinions of those
who’ll never really matter

Stacey is the superstar stylist
who tries to find bargains
to flatter my figure on a budget
I don’t know how she does it
I only know that she does
she never gives up
till I’m looking my best
and I really am dressed to impress

Pamela was and still is the writing mentor
who initially nurtured my creativity
persuading me to test my ability
in ways beyond what I thought was possible
preparing me for leadership
and the day I would mentor others

Lesley discovered the power of a women’s collective
to put this in perspective
we were fierce in our words and in our friendships
self censorship was not allowed
we were women and as a transwoman I was proud to be included
with these women of wisdom

Leanne has a vision of a kinder world
where poverty no longer exists
her christian faith by which she lives the rock of principled beliefs
for a woman of the book

Patricia plays the flute
schooling future generations to do the same .
to be proud of their tunes and their heritage
and not let a beautiful instrument be tainted
by those who scar the summer
when puppets march in malice

Laura is a fiddler known in her field
as one of brightest stars
in the traditional music community
an ally to others who need support
in personal battles
she has always championed the rights
of those who need lights shone
to navigate safely to the shore

Rachel sings and writes songs
on environment , community , and belonging
with a warmth that makes you want
to listen
to both the lyrics and the melodies
as it establishes connections
between audience and performer
whilst stilling the souls
of those who see her concerts

Hayley is a gifted footballer
standing tall as any man
who has ever played the game
she works in the caring profession
as women players don’t get
the fame their talents deserve
not in this country at least not yet
a star both on and off the park
she’s a team player who always hits the net
when it comes to supporting friends

Jen is much more than a co-host for our event
a loyal friend she is blessed with kindness and compassion
and editing skills beyond my reach
a double act was born on discovering
we shared a passion for the craft
now we support each other to express ourselves without inhibitions
as Pamela’s prediction is fulfilled
and having come full circle
I am the one doing the mentoring
she will one day give as a gift
to those who will follow the path we are currently traveling

© Gayle Smith 2021

Love In The Age Of Marketing

I’ve finally written this year’s Valentine’s poem It addresses the commercial side of the most romantic day of the year and it’s titled Love In The Age Of Marketing. This was a title suggested to me by my good friend Evelyn Bell for my Valentine’s poem three years ago. I decided not to use it on that occasion but I thought it was a good title which I should save for a more suitable poem. Well I’ve finally written that poem and I hope you enjoy the read.

Love In The Age Of Marketing.

Chocolates and flowers have magical powers
on this day every year
as card manufacturers hallmark the day
with greetings so fake they’re sincere
with schemes and dreams and best laid plans
made by romantics and charlatans.
this is 21st century lust
it’s love in the age of marketing

I wonder what would Valentine say
about all these different deals
there’s cards for every type of love
and then of course the meals
if your single and free get your dancing shoes on
you never know who you’ll discover
you could find the one who’ll be perfect for you
but don’t snog your besties wee brother

Well friends are forever but partners can change
like fashions or seasons of the year
as a poet I love it well I’m in demand
it’s the one day the world knows I’m here.
as when all would be lovers who can’t craft a rhyme
want me to write a few stanzas
I finally find that my skills are required
far more than some heavenly archers

© Gayle Smith. 2021

Twelve Days

Happy New Year one and all. Since my first post of the year is written on the first Monday of the month it seems appropriate to share this poem on the night Jen and I made our journey to our first ever night at Milk which was to become our new home for Words And Music . I’ve given it the title it Twelve Days when you read you’ll understand why.

Twelve Days (For Jen )

Slowly and carefully she maps out
a route to the future
it’s pitch black
as workers travel home
from their first day back
the empty streets
speak in the silence
as the Christmas decorations
shine for one last night
before the return to normality
ends the season of goodwill
tills jingle less than church bells
as the new year settles in
standing in the shadows of the city
she waits aprenhensively
on the arrival of her younger friend
hoping she doesn’t freeze to death in the chill of the winter air
on catching her eye
her companion rushes to meet her
and in the dark of a January sky
they catch up on Christmas stories
venturing together to the poetry night
they co-host
as they wait for the bus
in the quiet of an early evening
they see not ghosts
but a heart shaped chain
made by memories
and an unbreakable bond
grows stronger
with gifts of smiles and friendship
they will share for far longer
than just twelve days a year

© Gayle Smith 2021

Flushes And Fashion Police Can’t Stop A Woman In Her Golden Years ( The Post That Started A Friendship A Guest Post Written By Me For Jessica Lauren Hatcher)

It was the early summer of 2015 when I saw a younger blogger ask for other bloggers to write guest posts for her site while she went away on holiday. Now don’t ask me why but I decided to ask her if she might be interested in hearing the story of a late middle aged transwoman so imagine my surprise when a chatty 19 year old said that she would providing I could tailor it to suit her target demographic. In a fit of what I can only describe as insanity I decided to go for it, and in the process of doing so I began a friendship with Jessica Lauren Hatcher that endures to this day and is stronger now than it’s ever been. This is why I’ve given this post its original title Flushes And Fashion Police Can’t Stop A Woman In Her Golden Years then subtitled it The Post That Started A Friendship as that’s exactly what it did and that’s what can happen when collaborations work well as ours

http://www.jessicalaurenhatcher.com/2015/06/guest-post-flushes-and-fashion-police.html?m=0

Till next time

Gayle X

Dreams And Devotions. (For Glasgow City)

On this night of all nights I make no attempt to hide my Glasgow City loyalties or the hurt I am currently feeling for my colours, my manager, and my players. Looking back on this afternoon’s game there’s no doubt Rangers deserved their victory a 5-0 scoreline doesn’t lie. That said I believe in supporting my team in good times and in bad. Though I came late to the women’s game, when I decided to support City rather than my natural choice which would be Celtic I made myself a promise and that was never to abandon them. It’s on nights like this I step up and keep that promise with this poem which I’ve titled Dreams And Devotions I hope you enjoy the read.

Dreams And Devotions

Floodlights illuminate the empty stadium
as two tribes to go war
league points and bragging rights the prize for the victors
in this conflict
I know where my loyalties lie
and tonight they lie bloodied on a Cumbernauld field
the causality of dreams and expectations
this loss was a hard one to take
from those considered pretenders to our crown
they organised well for the contest
and only the deluded and dishonest
would say they did not deserve their victory
it was too convincing for that kind of chat
as the afternoon gave way to evening
I witnessed those with vulture like instincts
going in for the kill
using their weapons
with the skills of an archer
in both attack and defence
applying science common sense and trickery
to claim a significant win
against more experienced fighters not used to accepting second best
believe me this tribe will be hurting
but they will regroup for other challenges and tests
knowing I will stand by their side
my bonds of love
made stronger by dreams and devotions
as I share the pain of defeats
inflicted by rivals in the quest for our honours

© Gayle Smith 2020

Behind The Goals

As the women’s football season kicks off this is my poem for my girls by which I mean Glasgow City. I’ve titled it after the podcast presented by two of our greatest names though one of them now plays her football elsewhere. I refer to the dynamic duo our captain calls the twinnies for those who are not Glasgow City fans thats Leanne Crichton and Rachel Corsie. The title for those who haven’t guessed is Behind The Goals. I hope you enjoy the read.

Behind The Goals

Wrapped in optimism
I remember what my dad always said
a new season brings new hopes
dreams and ambitions have no limits
new names replace old favourites
and there are players with whom
I am unfamiliar
though this will change as the story
unfolds
in a year when games will be played
without supporters to cheer you on
at least at the start

I know you have the heart and the skills
to the be girls who bring the honours
home
and wish I was there to see you play
you found me a place in this game
to which I was a latecomer
some would say a stranger
god knows it should have been Celtic
for the same reason it could never be Rangers
but it wasn’t it was you
and Hayley saw to that.

her defiance captured my heart
then Claire and Jo saw it would never go back
and Leanne who can talk for Scotland
in the studio and on the park
grounded me in the ways of the club
and what it really means
what makes you different from other teams
the vision, the values, the dreams you hold
and in doing so she cemented
my place behind the goals

now all I can do is give you my support
my loyalty and my heart
till the day I’m watching games
with my dad
sometime in the far distant future
so as the new season starts
I am aware that over time
the new names in the squad will becomes familiar faces
stars will shine in our colours
and this emotional bond will grow
stronger
and one day I’ll stand behind the goals
to cheer you on win lose or draw

© Gayle Smith 2020

Two Clubs One Goal And A More Inclusive Game

As a football fan in a game known for it’s traditional tribal loyalties I am one of few supporters who can honestly say I support different teams in the men’s and women’s game. In the men’s game it has always been and will always be Celtic. In the women’s game however my allegencies lie with Glasgow City and neither of these loyalties will ever change.

It is I think fair to say that both teams though founded 111 years apart were born out of struggle and adversity to cater for the needs of particular demographic communities. Celtic were formed in 1887 in St Mary’s church hall in the Calton to help to provide food for the Irish catholic poor in the East End of Glasgow Whereas Glasgow City were founded in 1998 with a mission to provide a football club which catered exclusively for the needs of women and girls were and are still be proud to be a club which had and still have no links to the men’s game. So both clubs did things differently from the accepted traditional norms.

The facts that both clubs have become successful in spite of opposition from the established elites speaks volumes for them and their determination to succeed in spite of the prejudice and discrimination they both encountered in the early days. It is perhaps because of this prejudice and discrimination that both clubs made strong statements of support during the LGBT pride season.

As a football fan and a transwoman this meant a lot to me as I tend to be a bit sensitive on equality issues and it’s fair to say whether some people are comfortable with this or not that certain other clubs whose support base are and or at least like to think of themselves as part of the establishment have fan bases which are not so rainbow friendly though they do have LGBT fans amongst their number. That however is their business and dare I say it their problem. I make this comment because despite never having worn any football colours on the day I know what fans verbally abused both myself and our community as I walked with thousands of others including that club’s own LGBT support on a pride march in Glasgow city centre and here’s a clue they weren’t mine .

It is because of incidents like this I felt the need to write this post. You see as a transwoman I sometimes feel that there are certain people who don’t think I fit the traditional demographic of a football fan and though they may be technically correct at least for the moment I feel this has to change and Glasgow City are changing attitudes to the women’s game in the same way Celtic helped to weaken anti Irish sentiment a hundred years earlier by having a signing policy which was and remains open to players of all faiths and none.

By sticking to their principles and not linking up with a men’s team Glasgow City have proved there is a place for those who do things differently and value their own vision above that those who would sell their souls for a handful of magic beans. The fact I am welcomed by both my clubs is I think a positive step for the future of our national game and believe me I am just as passionate about the women’s game than I am about the men’s. Well as those know me will testify I don’t do things by halves and as a poet I wear my heart on my sleeve and that is why I support two clubs one goal and a more inclusive game.

Till next time

Gayle X

The Promiscuity Myth (For Bisexual Viability Day)

On bisexual visibility day this poem attempts to tackle one of the most damaging, and dangerous , stereotypical myth faced by the bisexual community face and continue to face and that is the all bisexuals are greedy, promiscuous, sex mad individuals who can’t make up our minds who really need to pick a side.
Now I hate to tell these people but sexuality is not football and you can’t just a pick a side and stick to it for the rest of your life nor can you decide who you are going to find attractive or who’ll be attracted to you. I’ve given it the title The Promiscuity Myth I hope you enjoy the read.

The Promiscuity Myth

I am bisexual
but I am not promiscuous
I am not nor will I ever be
open to anyone
with a pulse
If I’m honest the idea of multiple partners
has never appealed to me
though it works for some
and if they can cope with more than one lover at a time
then who am I knock what they enjoy
being a killjoy has never been my scene
yes it is possible to feel attracted to both sexes
or those who are gender fluid
or non binary
but that does not mean
that every bisexual is promiscuous
many of us and I include myself in this
are very selective as to who we kiss
or get intimate with
deliberately choosing
to get physical with only one sex
we do this to fit in
to society’s version of normality
I made decision the years ago
never to flaunt my sexuality
I wasn’t raised that way
it just isn’t me
it never will be
yes occasionally I will yield to temptation
but though I can be attracted to women
I tend to stick to men
after all for a transwoman it makes perfect sense
to play by the rules of heterosexual world
even if I don’t agree with them
or the restraints they place upon on my needs
I’ve never been greedy
as far as I’m concerned
it’s always been about fitting in
being accepted for who I am
rather than who they want me to be
It’s challenging enough
being trans let alone trans and bi
and that is the reason why
I keep my love life
or what there is of it private
that’s as it should be
I don’t want curious
or as I call them nosey types
asking intrusive questions
or making suggestions
as to how I should spice up my life
I won’t change partners or genders every night
to suit the needs of others
I may have discovered myself
later in life
but whether I take a husband or a wife
it will be my choice after all it is my life
with whoever nature believes should be the one
now I might have suffered from self doubt
due to the barbies and party dresses
Santa and my parents
thought I could do without
but in spite of that I have always had self respect
and selected suitors
in the same way
which is to say
there must be a bond or an emotional connection
yes I am bisexual
but I am not and will never be promiscuous
and I refuse to accept this stereotypical myth that others believe is my curse

© Gayle Smith 2020