As we slowly but steadily settle in to 2019 I look back on the year just gone and in a particular my year as a woman. As I do so I think of all the highs and lows of the last 12 months and see where my journey has taken me. I say that I look at my year as a woman because there are certain sections of society who refuse to accept that transwoman are real women but I make no apologies for saying that we are and they need to get over themselves. That said, it’s time to get on with the review and look at what has been a rather eventful 12 months.
It is fair to say that many of my best memories of 2018 have been when I’ve spent time with other women. These memories included times at Celtic Connections to kick start January which was as always immensely enjoyable and the fact that I caught up with good friends and made new ones during the madness of the gathering shows the special place it will always have in my heart
Of course my cultural activities are mainly of the poetic variety and I must admit that some of my favourite moments of the year were those spent with the tribe or as you’ll know them Women With Fierce Words. Whether it be at spoken word events in Falkirk Glasgow and Leith or in one case Bearsden (Thanks Catriona) , or a radio studio in Govan when we were live on air being interviewed by one of our own (Carla) I love spending time with this brilliant collective of women who support each other through sisterhood and friendship and when I say we rocked the Hidden Door Festival I’m not joking . The whole event was fantastic and the atmosphere was amazing but I think I scared poor Carla and her mum by falling on my backside during our walk back to the bus station.
In other poetry related activities excluding Words And Music where I gained the best co-host in the world in the lovely and highly talented Jen Hughes, I had memorable nights at Express Yourself at the Project Cafe especially as part of an all women event in February and a trans and non-binary night in April
Taking a trip away from the performance scene for a moment, I have to mention KK Snaps Big Wedding Event as it provided one of the craziest memories of the year. Having bought only one ticket for the raffle I ended up winning the main prize of a full day’s wedding photography from KK Snaps. As Donny Osmond is unavailable and I had no plans to get married I eventually managed to give my prize to a lovely young bride and remove the worry of her needing to find a photographer for her special day.
Picture (1) Katie Walker And The Team At K K Snaps
There were also fantastic times at Words And Music’s first ever planning meeting where Jen and I organised the entire featured writers programme from May to December in one afternoon. Honestly my co-host is amazing and brimming full of brilliant ideas
May saw me at the Women Of Glasgow Let Your Hair Down event which took place at The Space. The fact that this all day gathering was organised by a 21 year old tells me that young women have the drive, talent , and ambition to do whatever they want providing the patriarchy don’t downsize their dreams. However, being the force of nature that she is I’m sure Megan Elliot won’t let that happen to her. I must admit though, that while I really loved performing at the event, this day was about much more than that. This was a day I took part in workshops, enjoyed a tasty meal, made good friendships, and took home more new clothes than anyone should ever be legally allowed to carry and all for the price of a donation. Then of course there was Hidden Door where a group of women who really know how to rock. As proof of our new rock star status Catriona and I ended up signing autographs. Okay we may not be in the same earnings league as The Spice Girls but it sure felt good to be surrounded by adoring fans.
Next up was my local church fayre where a young member of the church who had just come back from her holiday couldn’t wait to catch up with all my news just in case there was any potential gossip she needed to know. Well, she couldn’t let her mum dad or wee sister find out first. That wasn’t on now or ever and believe me she knows it. Trust me when I say this was one of the highlights of my year as this is someone I’ve seen grow up and who like her sister can get me a wee bit misty eyed on certain occasions. This was also a month in which I had another enjoyable meeting with Jen and made my first visit to All Sorts Caberet and went to Inn Deep for the first time in far too long to support Jen who was making her debut there at the end of the month. This night was memorable for than just the poetry as it included the maddest rush for a train that I’ve ever been involved in as Jen and her lovely boyfriend Aleasandro held up the subway to make sure I got the last train in to town.
With July came Pride and though it was a bit chaotic and I never managed to get a ticket I did meet up with Jen, Sandro, and Jean-Luc and that meant I was probably one of the select few who was happy on that the fateful day. There was also one other highlight in what is traditionally a quiet month for me
Picture (2) Jen And I At Pride Glasgow 2018 on a day of Sunshine and Rainbows
With August it was the turn of The Edinburgh Fringe to provide the memories but not before Jen and I had organised a birthday bash to celebrate five birthdays which fell between July and September. The birthday’s concerned started with mine in mid July and ended with hers in early mid September. This was a lovely night and the perfect way to set us all up for the fringe.
Speaking of the fringe I was delighted with my performances this year, they may have been fewer in number but they were the best I’ve ever given in 14 fringes. I was especially pleased to be promoted from open mic slot to a cast member in Other Voices which is my favourite show of the fringe and run by the amazing force of nature that is Fay Roberts. I have to say I was nervous before the first of my slots even though I knew it could perform to the level expected of me. The fact it went better than I had ever dared to hope was a real boost to my confidence. As for the second of those slots let’s just it was my best ever performance at the fringe and the perfect way to finish my festival year. Apart from Other Voices I performed twice at The School Of Poets events at The Scottish Poetry Library and once for the very talented cast of a show in which on that particular night I was the only audience member and since they were kind enough not to bring out the bucket I decided to impromptu set for them as a payment in kind . Having said that, I think was unfair that on that particular night I got five times the audience than a brilliantly talented cast. Other fringe highlights included going to see Imogen Stirling in her wonderful and thought provoking show Hypocrisy, and being the only poet invited to perform at the Music For The Beetson event in which I performed my first ever 30 minute mini show based on my musical journey through the years and it was a really enjoyable experience.
Picture (3) Me on my first appearance as a cast member at Other Voices
September saw me back on home turf as yet another Edinburgh took its place in the history books. There was of course the traditional gathering at Words And Music to kick off the month though this time I was doing it without Jen and though I did okay I have to admit I did feel lost without her. There were also the usual gigs at Waterstones and Express Yourself the later of which returned from its summer break. However the main highlights outside of Words And Music came within the space of a few days included accepting the challenge from Jim Ewing to be featured writer at September’s Faith/Unbelief for which I not only wrote new material inspired more often than not the lovely Samantha Naidoo but realised I had more faith based poetry than I ever previously believed . My other highlight of what was a very busy month was perhaps the most sentimental and emotional journey I’ve made as a poet when I went back to the University of Strathclyde to perform at my old alma mata for The Live Poets Society which brilliantly hosted by Jade Mitchell. It was a cracking night and in the familar surroundings of Level 5 of the best student union in the country I gave one of my best performances of the year and during freshers week 2018 I finally read the poem I wrote in 2015 on the 20th anniversary of my freshers week in 1995 and the journey through my university years which culminated with me being one of the class of 99 and one of the last graduates of both the 20th century and the second millennium.
With October came what has to be the beginning of a better self care routine. As always it started with a cracking night at Words And Music and with Jen back from her holiday it was time for a long overdue catch up before what was a brilliant night with Ailie Wallace and Stevie Clark providing brilliant featured sets and the added bonus of me receiving my contributors copy of the Rooftop Writers Anthology in which she kindly published my poem First Steps.
Buoyed by a cracking night at Words And Music I made my way to my first gender identity meeting in four years. This was a very empowering meeting for me and I got on well with the consultant who said that I presented myself as a convincing woman and we established a good raport. I also got the answers to some questions I had long been pondering and we talked about potential surgery options before I made my way back home to prepare for the National Poetry Day event the following day.
When it came the National Poetry Day event was as enjoyable I had hoped it would be though unusually for me I never went out afterwards. All things considered October was a quiet month after that first action packed week with only a performance with Women With Fierce Words a Sunday Slam in which I was in the winning team and my regular appearance at Waterstones to come after it. I must admit to being disappointed to miss out on the big March for Independence when 100, 000 people marched through the streets of our capital in support of our cause and missing out on Express Yourself was also hard to take but injuries restricted my activity in the autumn and sometimes you just had to do as I did and accept the things you couldn’t change.
November saw a quiet month when it came to live events with only Words And Music a Sunday Slam, and Waterstones to keep me busy on the performance front. That said however, it was a busy month on the blogs and many new poems were written for future performance, but the highlight of my month was my piece for Common Space which I wrote for International Transgender Remembrance Day for the third successive year and it’s my belief that this year’s piece on why trans people should write and archieve our own histories was my best one I’ve written to date. There was also the small matter of the church Christmas fayre which though it didn’t quite hit the heights of last year still raised a substantial amount of money for church funds.
The final month of the year started with a brilliant Words And Music Christmas Cracker which was the perfect way to round off another year of the event as Jen and I celebrated our first year of our double act. Being the season of advent much of my time was centred round church though there was one last event to attend and co host namely the Federation Of Writers Scotland Tinsil Tales gathering at the Gallery Of Modern Art. This was a cracking if chaotic day as I had forgotten that I had a dental appointment right in the middle of it. Note to self this is not a good plan but somehow everything fell in to plan and it all worked out well in the end. I should have known things would work out for me as earlier in the day whilst waiting for the bus in to the city centre I was talking to a woman and I mentioned that I was a transwoman she said she wouldn’t have known had I not told her.
After a successful end to my performances for the year all that remained to do was go in to town for some last minute Christmas shopping including Scottish Slam tickets for Jen and I and attend two church services on Christmas Eve and give a certain Rangers fan his personalised poem I wrote about his first game even though like his wife I support Celtic. Well it goes without saying our supporters are far more talented. With that done and completed I began to look forward to 2019 but that as they say will be a different story and I hope you’ll be here to read it throughout this year and beyond.
Till next time
Gayle X
Skirtingroundmylife 